RCS – Business Default

She can blossom on a physical and spiritual level, expand her horizons and enjoy herself in a way she never knew or could before. It’s not that she wants to be as young as possible, but that she has the opportunity to start her life anew. The condition for this, however, is that he does not cling to former patterns of giving, arranges relationships with those closest to him, finally puts himself first and sets clear and decisive boundaries in his relationships with others. For her, life is no longer a problem to be solved, but a miracle to be lived.

Time is on her side. Women’s lives after fifty have escaped the hands of evolution, say scientists. Nature did not imagine that they would live so long. Although after menopause, which ends the period of childbearing, a woman should live for some time (only in primates, life ends when fertility is over) mainly because young people need to be helped to stand on their own two feet! – it turned out that things got out of hand and that the period after menopause can be even longer than before it. So time is on the woman’s side, no matter how absurd it sounds in a modern society that persistently celebrates youth.

Mistress of your life. The decline of emotional hormones, which fueled a woman’s need to take care of others and the desire to avoid conflicts, is the main “culprit” that now, in the mature period, she no longer wants to take care of others, but to please herself, live by her own rules and be the mistress of her own. life.

More and more women perceive aging as a privilege, because now they dare to do what they want. Aging gives them the freedom to speak up and say what they mean. They don’t want more “disturbing” things around them: they don’t want (more) family, because they gave enough to everyone and gave themselves to the end; they don’t want (too) passionate relationships because they don’t want to be subject to emotions (anymore); they don’t want any authority over them. And period.

Of course, this is not a pun or a denial of the past – it’s about a woman rejoicing because she finally has time to dig deeper into herself. A reborn woman is not bitter, vindictive and exhausted. On the contrary, she is full of good will and energy.

He wants new challenges, develops his talents, dares to bite into work, many take on new business challenges, while others no longer want to work, but afford what they have always dreamed of. They demonstrate skills they didn’t have time for before, or they enjoy simple everyday life and small joys.

Solitude as a choice. The children quickly accept the changed mother and support her new challenges and admire her courage, which could not be said for their spouses or partners. That is why most requests for divorce after the age of fifty are filed by women, although, according to the stereotype, men are supposed to look for a mistress and a new car to console themselves with aging, and then leave their wives. Stereotypes no longer apply.

Today, a 68-year-old Slovenian woman, let’s call her Branka, has been living on one of the smaller Dalmatian islands for a good decade, and her son Borut proudly tells how one fine day she hitched the family trailer to the car, stuffed a few basic survival items and a mountain of unread books into it, and left bitter husband and embarked on a new life.

“If you ask her today why she did that, she usually says that she needed peace and time because she was behind in her reading,” laughs Borut. “Supposedly, he and his father planned to live a nice old age on trips and in a house by the sea, but father changed and after retirement he was not interested in anything except washing two cars and mowing the grass around the house, he even started drinking because he only saw his own in his old age physical decay. Mother, who was always devoted to him and to us, our three sons, and who held the reins of family life and brought joy to everyone, as soon as we stood on our own feet and when she successfully concluded her business journey, decided that she did not want to support father’s listlessness. She left him the house and embarked on a new life path. For three years she lived in a trailer in an olive grove by the sea to find out what she really wanted. Then she bought a house and rented a piece of land, where she grows herbs and deals in cosmetics, which she also sells quite successfully. Every year, he spends an average of three months traveling, and in recent years he has also helped himself by exchanging houses on the Internet,” says Borut. “We love to visit it and draw on this inexhaustible source of joy for life. He is an example to us all.

Dreams are important. In his book Solitude, the English psychiatrist Anthony Storr suggested to elderly people who fell into depression to remember what they dreamed about when they were younger, to return to the hobbies they once had, but had to abandon jobs and families. But men have a hard time grasping the importance of solitude and hobbies and creativity. After the age of fifty or sixty, life seems meaningless and empty to them, dreams and daydreaming do not come to mind, and women intuitively know that this can trigger a process of internal development in them, which can completely change their attitude to life. There is no need to move mountains, some women already make a move by crocheting, connect to a network of those who are engaged in it, organize gatherings, workshops, carry out projects, even devote themselves to charity and are generally active. There is a lot of joy, there is no time for loneliness.

In any case, we should not exaggerate the fact that women are said to be flying on the wings of old age, because, of course, their vitality and adaptability decline, their strength dries up, and perhaps their health also declines. That’s when it comes to the fore that they do everything in their own biorhythm, that they get enough rest, that they passionately surrender to things, that creativity comes spontaneously, because it is not burdened with excessive youthful ambitions. They are happier because they are under less stress and have no regrets, they are less burdened by negative information and can control their feelings. They also don’t care about status competition. Most of them enjoy a newfound philosophy of life: less is more. Their wardrobes are half-empty, and the new fashions in the shop windows rarely make them drool, let alone tear up, to afford them. They prefer to buy a plane ticket and wander around interesting places. Memories that had previously gathered dust have gone to the dustbin, high-heeled shoes are a beautiful memory of the old days, and only here and there they strain their leg muscles to prove that they can still dance and seduce in them .

Sex is a favorite pastime of the elderly. Age in itself is not a reason to change sexuality. On the contrary, research shows that after gardening and food, sex is the most popular pastime of the 50- to 70-year-olds. For a good quarter of Abraham women, sexuality is even in the first place. Are you surprised?You should know that most people’s satisfaction and interest in sex does not decline over the years. Of course, there will be changes, we will not avoid them, but the desire for physical and emotional intimacy and giving and receiving pleasure is timeless. Let’s not forget that the main erogenous zones are the mind and imagination. Those who don’t understand that there are many types of love and intimacy and many ways to enjoy sex will miss out on a lot in their old age. Older people know how to tone down the seriousness of sex and add a sense of fun to it. That “old bitch, good soup” does not necessarily have a pejorative connotation; neither for a woman nor for a man.